• Rentlar@lemmy.ca
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    155
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    4 months ago

    Someone wrote a whole treatise on how to be more introverted, but they didn’t publish it anywhere.

    • Crowfiend@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      11
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      4 months ago

      You had me in the first half, ngl. Then you revealed the second half and I angry laughed at myself. Good job. 👍

  • solsangraal@lemmy.zip
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    137
    arrow-down
    3
    ·
    4 months ago

    how to be more social: learn how to pretend to enjoy pointless small talk and conversations around topics you couldn’t give less of a flying fuck about

    /savedyouaclick

    • 4lan@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      15
      ·
      4 months ago

      Sometimes I have to tell one of my friends who has ADD that the lack of breaks in talking pushes my anxiety to the edge. I swear he doesn’t breathe sometimes lol

  • BlanketsWithSmallpox@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    72
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    4 months ago

    WAIT - Why am I talking?

    For the people who can’t shut up during meetings when they don’t have anything useful to add.

    • silasmariner@programming.dev
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      15
      ·
      4 months ago

      I have actually said that exact phrase out loud on occasion. I used to be really quite introvert but then I found my group and I’m pretty extrovert with them! Sometimes so much so that I realise I’ve been ‘holding forth’ and should probably shut up and let everyone else have a go.

      • IndiBrony@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        7
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 months ago

        I did this the other night on discord when someone brought up politics. Girlfriend had to step in and tell me to shut up.

        Normally I’m the quietest one on VC 😂

      • SpacetimeMachine@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        4 months ago

        I’ve been going to therapy after realizing I’m somewhat autistic and had a revelation that for all the groups I’ve been in where I felt extroverted the other people were also neurodivergent. It feels awesome to find a group that you really jive with!

  • heavy@sh.itjust.works
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    38
    arrow-down
    6
    ·
    4 months ago

    The introverted extroverted propaganda is a scam, people are complex and aren’t one way all the time.

      • heavy@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        20
        arrow-down
        3
        ·
        4 months ago

        Nobody recharges by being around groups of people all the time though. Everyone needs a break, even from family and close friends.

        Anecdotally, I’m “extroverted” but it still takes energy to interact with people.

        • Crowfiend@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          4 months ago

          I originally upvoted dark whatever instead of you. Coming back 2hr later I changed my votes because (metaphorically) as you said, it’s not black or white, it’s shades of gray.

          In my youth I often thought of myself as an introvert, because, “I just don’t like people.” As I’ve grown I’ve come to realize that I’m perfectly sociable in the right crowd.

          To that end, I’ve come to see myself as an introverted extrovert, it vice versa, because idk proper terms. But I’m much more talkative (for better or worse) around people I identify with, whereas if I were alone around a group of new people, I shut down and retreat to my safe corner.

          People are very multifaceted individually and it’s such a strange oxymoron that “there is no true ideal” is an objective fact, no matter how much we wish it to be so.

          Unfortunately, until people can (on whole) see both positives and negatives per individual person/situation, and not just the dogma attached to each piece, we may never overcome this roadblock…

  • gdog05@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    32
    ·
    4 months ago

    There is a very good book on exactly this topic. “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking” by Susan Cain

    I wish it were mandatory for anyone in a managerial position to read this.

    • Crowfiend@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      They say, “don’t judge a book by its cover!” yet I’m compelled to tell myself, I’m enthralled over the Title, not the cover.

  • danc4498@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    19
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    4 months ago

    I bet more people that are introverts would rather be extroverts than the opposite. People that are extroverts probably love that about themselves.

  • Frank Ring@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    13
    ·
    4 months ago

    Both introverts and extroverts are valuable in their own ways. They both bring unique qualities.

    Unfortunately, many societies tend to prefer extroverts because they tend to be more social, likeable, relatable and understandable.

    Introverts can be seen as weird and anti-social.

    That being said, you should be able to embody all qualities in a balanced way.

  • itsnicodegallo@lemm.ee
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    13
    arrow-down
    6
    ·
    4 months ago

    I believe they just described meditation? It’s a practice where you quietly reflect by yourself. It’s not big yet or anything. There might be an app about it. Idk. Hopefully it catches on.

    • velvetThunder@lemmy.zip
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      10
      ·
      4 months ago

      Well the shared article and the tweet are referring to social situations. But I like the thought of extroverts mediating at the party, dinner table or waiting room.

      • vulgarcynic@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        ·
        4 months ago

        As an extrovert that is about to go to a wedding reception, I’m just going to start vibing out and meditating in the middle of the dance floor. (As opposed to trying to get everyone to take shots and come join the party like I usually do) I will report back with results.

      • papertowels@lemmy.one
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        4 months ago

        My understanding of extroversion and introversion is that they’re primarily dictated by “what gives you energy” - in social situations, extroverts get energy, while in isolated situations introverts gain energy.

        The article refers to introverts out of their environment, so it makes sense that tips about being better at introversion center around when extroverts are out of their environment, i.e. by themselves. Meditation for extroverts would 100% satisfy that.

      • itsnicodegallo@lemm.ee
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        2
        arrow-down
        1
        ·
        4 months ago

        I’m trying to imagine a social situation where everybody is being quiet and reflective instead of talking and responding like the tweet is suggesting. My mind just keeps manifesting a prayer circle or something. 😅

        Or somebody telling a story, and it going like:

        “And it turned out it was a freaking SHARK!”

        “…Hm…”

        “Uh… Is something wrong?”

        “No, I’m just… Thinking about it…”

        “😦 All right.”

  • aaaaace@lemmy.blahaj.zone
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    7
    ·
    4 months ago

    Simple breath meditation should be taught in public achools from an early age. It is a useful and valuable human skill that could serve anyone who practices it.

    Instead we have rote religion and caffeine to enervate for eventual corporate productivity.

    Society rewards the enervated but depends upon the socially reticent thinkers.

  • ThePJN@sopuli.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    5
    ·
    4 months ago

    “You’re awfully loud over there. You haven’t tried to just let the world be all night.”