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ZeroCool@lemmy.ca to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 21 days ago

Ted Cruz Assures Texans He Working Tirelessly To Get Vacation Refunded

theonion.com

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Ted Cruz Assures Texans He Working Tirelessly To Get Vacation Refunded

theonion.com

ZeroCool@lemmy.ca to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 21 days ago
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KERRVILLE, TX—Promising grieving Texans he would do everything in his power to make things right in the wake of last week’s deadly floods, Sen. Ted Cruz assured his constituents Wednesday that he was working tirelessly to get the rest of his Greek vacation refunded. “I have spent countless hours on the phone persuading Capital One […]
  • SwingingTheLamp@midwest.social
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    21 days ago

    What does it say on his birth certificate?

    • pelespirit@sh.itjust.works
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      21 days ago

      We’d have to go to Canada to find out.

      • Tuchowski@troet.cafe
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        21 days ago

        @pelespirit Ah, logically born in Alberta…
        @SwingingTheLamp

    • givesomefucks@lemmy.world
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      21 days ago

      Long form…

      Wait, we’re supposed to wait till he provides the normal one, then change what we’re asking for

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