You know what? Santos was pretty funny and was representative of the absurdity of our failing systems and the gullibility of the American people.
Also, I love the palpable irony of a member of Congress being expelled by other members of Congress for dishonesty and misrepresenting themselves.
Fuck it, him and pizza. He might have a few more laughs at his expense to give.
Also, I’m guessing McConnell didn’t make the list because he’s technically undead at this point.
No, Mitch McConnell is a turtle, we’ve been over this a number of times. Theylive to be like a 150 years old. But he might have another 100 years depending on the kind of turtle he is.
I’ve never thought that was fair to turtles.
They might be cold blooded, but they aren’t that cold blooded.
Until now, I liked turtles. Now, I’m not so sure.
Aren’t tortoises the ones that can live that long?
Maybe, I’m not a McConnellologist, so I can’t really say for sure.
If I’m being honest with myself, as much as I hate myself for saying it, it really depends on how “grateful” Boebert would be…
God I’m a terrible person.
You can fix her
Then you start thinking, if I also save trump, am I more likely to receive a handjob in a theatre?
yes, just ask trump to give you a handjob duh
If you’ve got a pussy he gives those out for free. Whether you want them or not.
Don’t think it would take as much as a fire. Just take her to the movies.
When you’re like “It must be an act, she can’t be that crazy, right?” So you do it and then you realize that yeah, she’s that crazy…
(But you still go back!)
She’s going to shoot you in the dick and then tell all the country’s untreated mentally ill that you’re a pedophile.
This is what I’m saying! She could have lived her life in blissful ignorance as a moderately successful MILF pornstar! But you wanted to feel power this year. So now you’re going to feel my power, as it surges from me through you from nostril to rectum now until the end of tiiiiiime. And that’s… wazzup.
(if you get this reference please be my friend)
And shave off that beard…
BE MY FRIEND
Lol. I felt like that was generally a pretty weak season in general, but that bit will always be memorable.
And you’d even have the pizza for after.
2 things are sure : I will eat tacos and pizza after I am done with this stressful event.
I eat good food and make the world a better place. Win win
Say what you want about her politics, but I’d definitely hit that. Also I’m sure it’s fine if she’s gagged. Pretty sure she’d be into that too.
I figured tacos and handjobs/blowies too tbh.
I’ve been vegan for almost six years and I would still go for the beef tacos and pepperoni pizza. A week of explosive diarrhea is still better than the alternatives.
The pizza and tacos will fuck you up but at least you’ll enjoy them
You don’t have to eat them, just save them from the fire.
Once they’re cooked
Hell, you can do that with all of them.
It’s like fentanyl. One touch and just explosive diarrhea everywhere.
Did…you think you were eating the people?
NOBODY EXPLAINED THE RULES TO ME!
I find it funny that your comment unintentionally makes it sound like all Vegans have a predicament, let’s call it divine punishment or karma or weakness or something like that, that causes them to shit themselves after eating any animal product.
Is your digestive system really that weak? Lmao, vegans suck.
Happens to anyone really. You cut out bad food your body has been tolerating and it stops tolerating. (I’m not vegan, but milk based stuff, fatty foods, fast food, and a bunch of other shitty for me stuff stopped being acceptable to my body once I stopped eating them regularly. Unfortunately I also suddenly go5 super reactive to eggs, and I love eggs. No more delicious yolk for me T_T)
Second note: ( I don’t actually have any issues with vegans. I think ultimately they are probably correct, but I still eat meat anyway, just as I also post this response on a Samsung cell phone that probably had slave labor involved in some part of its production).
There’s a lot of unhealthy vegan food out there. And lean meat, veggies, on a tortilla seems fine.
I’d rescue pizza and tacos. If I could rescue three I would rescue pizza twice.
If I could only save 9 things I would have so many tacos and pizzas
But there are 4 tacos…
Sorry, pizza and tacos, but I have to stay on guard to make sure the others don’t escape.
Of course you save the pizza and tacos. The others can save themselves by pulling themselves out by the bootstraps.
I’d skip the saving and just spend my time kicking Trump in the balls.
Lol even if I could save all of them I’d still only take the pizza and tacos
Can I move Trump closer to the flames?
Only if you sacrifice both the pizza and the tacos.
We can make another
I’d sacrifice both food items to make sure the other fuckers die in the fire.
It’s less “sacrifice” and more “baiting the trap”, really.
Anyone that isn’t saving George Santos clearly doesn’t find joy in life. That guy is unintentionally hilarious and it’s easily the funniest story that we really didn’t give enough credit to. I mean, for the memes alone I’m going Santos and Tacos
Let’s please not laugh Santos into the Whitehouse.
At this point, I’m crossing my fingers for it. Santos coming out of nowhere to take the GOP nomination away from Trump would honestly be the best timeline. Somehow even with zero verifiable credentials I think we might be better off lmao
So instead of selling nuclear secrets, Santos would just raise the national debt to fund makeovers and only fans… I can’t say that is worse.
Finally, tax dollars paying for what the people want.
That is the guy you have in a party that always have the craziest stories. In your head you know half of it or all of it is fake… But it’s fun nonetheless…
I feel the need to do air quotes every time I say “George” “Santos” because who the fuck is he really? I wouldn’t be surprised if it was 3 kids in a trench coat.
#3, the tacos and #9, the pizza.
#8 is actually Santos and he tried to fool me.
O I would rescue two humans. No one knows I have them after right? RIGHT??
Those look like Pizza Hut and Taco Bell. Assuming that, I would still save the pizza and tacos.
You would save the combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell?
8 and 9.
I can listen to Santos weave tall tales about his life as I eat my pizza.
His days in Seal team 6 were pretty interesting
Well he was the sole founder of the team.
He was actually a literal seal in those days though
The only reason he made the team was because no one could believe that an actual animal seal was single flipperly taking out some of Americas top targets.
Achieving tenure at Sea World is definitely one of his top 3 achievements on his lifetime.
Not nearly as interesting as the time he walked on the moon.
Seriously, I’d pick any two of 1, 2, 4, 5, 6, 7, or 9. Only so that I could have the satisfaction of running them back into the burning building.
