You couldn’t make Back to the Future II today because a positive outlook on the future is no longer believable even for a family film.
Idiocracy
You would get sued by FOX ‘News’ for copying their daily programming.
You couldn’t make half of Seinfeld because with cell phone all the funny situations don’t occur.
None of those situations were funny to actually live through. They’re only funny in a TV show.
True of literally every sitcom.
“Comedy is tragedy plus time”. I like to say it’s comedy plus distance.
I think both are true.
A man gets a paper cut, that’s drama. They fall down an open manhole and die. That’s comedy.
- Mel Brooks
24 (TV series) is like this if I remember well. The daughter would have had a cellphone now.
That’s why so many tv shows are now written as period pieces or based in the 80s and 90s.
Eh, series today still use this trope. “Oh no, I’m out of battery” or the comedic “My battery is at 1%, let’s take a selfie!”
That scene where he calls the phone in his stolen car would still be funny
You couldn’t make Titanic today because it wouldn’t be believable… Leonardo Decaprio dating a woman his own age? Preposterous!
You couldn’t make Citizen Kane because flashbacks and other innovative filming techniques are now the norm.
Hackers: because no one rollerblades anymore.
Daybreakers.
First, it’s a mid-budget movie, and Hollywood doesn’t make much of those nowadays.
Secondly, it commits to a wild premise: vampires become the dominant life form in the world. It’s fun, but the actors play it straight. If the tried to do that now, it’d be full of quips and winking at the audience rather than committing to the bit.
You couldn’t make Blazing Saddles today, most of the cast is dead.
That’s fine, a mega-corporation can just buy their AI rights from their estates
If AI ever learns to shout like Gene Wilder, the species is doomed.
Hold it hold it… What the hell is that shit?!
Well you’ve got things like Tupac’s hologram performing. And then there’s things like this
The company is planning a biopic, an avatar show and a KISS-themed experience
You cannot make the Minecraft movie nowadays… you simply cannot, Warner Bros.
To that bottom comment in the picture. You’d be amazed at how incompetent the TSA and other security staff can be at most airports.
I don’t know if this is still accurate, but the TSA failed their surprise tests over 90% of the time.
They didn’t stop the shoe bomber or the underwear bomber either. There’s a term for what they are, “security theater”. They make it look like they’re doing something to protect you, when really all their doing is stealing whatever they can get away with stealing and fingering people’s buttholes as often as possible.
Collateral with Jamie Foxx and Tom Cruise because instead of hiring a taxi for the whole night it be easier to call a fresh Uber after each kill.
Arrival with Amy Adams because people would insist on using AI to translate the alien language.
Blow with Johnny Depp because of fentanyl ruining the ability to just snort a line of whatever whenever.
Dude, Where’s My Car? Ashton Kutcher pulls out his key fob and presses the button, the car beeps and they find it immediately.
Stuart Little - mice can’t talk anymore
You couldn’t make Cool Runnings today because the Jamaican bobsled team has been around for a few decades.
Really any movie that involves legacy telephones.
- Phone Booth: The whole movie
- Scream: “The call is coming from inside the house”
- The Matrix: “Pick up the phone!”
- Etc, etc.
